There are things that happen in our lives from time to time which knock us for six… and we buckle under the pressure and stress of them… and then there are those things which come at us like a curve ball.. and we cope with them beautifully….

I learnt a lesson… its been a long time coming… but.. at 37 years old… my 38th birthday only three months away… I learnt the difference between wanting something.. and needing it… or more importantly… thinking I need something.. when really.. in all honesty… I just want it…

That want might be overpowering.. and the fear of what will happen if I don’t get what I want is very scary.. but I have today realised that there is something very important in my life that I want.. but don’t actually need….

When I thought I needed this thing… it took over my whole life.. to the exclusion of many many things… today.. literally two hours ago… like a blinding flash of light… the difference came to me…

The difference between want… and need….

No… my life is not dependent on this thing….
No… my happiness is not dependent on this thing…
Yes… my life will go on without it..
Yes.. I will be happy… even if I don’t have this thing in my life…

Epiphany anyone????

I’m over it already….
I feel better for it…
I feel stronger for it…

And of course in three days I’ll fall apart and be a bag of spanners… but lets deal with that when it happens.