After yesterdays afternoon madness from PSNM I was prepared for anything today… and sure enough.. I got it.. and then some…..

He called in the late morning… calling me fatty.. I hung up the phone on him. He then proceeded to call over and over again… 40 calls in the space of 12 minutes. Its hard to understand whats actually going through his mind when he does this.. and why.

He has a pattern… and it goes like this… ALWAYS. He’ll phone at some random time in the day and obviously because I’m not anticipating his call he always actually gets the chance to say something before I hang up on him. Once I have hung up on him after he has abused me the first time.. I’m “on the ball” so to speak and anticipating his calls back I say “Good Morning/Afternoon.. blah blah blah.. and then as soon as he draws breath and starts to speak.. I know its him.. his tone of voice is so distinctive.. so I hang up on him. And I do this again and again and again. Its what I’ve been told to do by the Police. They tell me that I don’t have to listen to his abuse and so I am well within my rights to just hang up the phone on him.

What will he say if I let him carry on speaking you ask???? I found that out this afternoon.

I answered the phone as I usually do.. and he said “I’m going to f***ing kill you”… and he hung up the phone on me. I knew it was him immediately… and then he started calling back over and over and over.. each time I hung up the phone on him as he started to soeak. And I sat there. shaking.. upset.. scared.. sick of all the bullshit that has surrounded this whole debacle and it suddenly came to me what I had been told by one of the PC’s who have taken statements from me. What he is doing isn’t even an arrestable offence because its classed as “Mis-use of the telecommunications network” or some bollocks like that. And I sat there thinking.. this fucking man can threaten to kill me.. and there is NOTHING I can do about it… because its his word agasinst mine.. and hes being done for harrassment and this mis-use of the telecommunications thing.

I’d had enough.. and I just knew.. deep down.. that given the opportunity he would threaten me again… so I got a dictaphone… set it all up.. (Alf came and sat with me whilst we did it) and when another call came in instead of hanging up the phone.. I turned the dictaphone on… put the the phone on “loudspeaker” and answered the call with the generic hello… and then didn’t say another word….

The abuse that man gave me was simply disgusting… and now I’ve got it all on tape… it isn’t me being reactionary.. or sensative… its him getting a kick out of abusing me… because I dared to do my job properly one day back in December of last year and I wouldn’t give him the home phone number of his solicitor.

He called a number of times.. each one answered with a generic polite hello and the name of the firm.. and each time he was recorded screaming abuse at me down the phone.. saying despicable things about my Mother…. about my family until finally.. I got what I wanted.. and what I knew he would do.. He threatened to kill me and bludgeon my family to death. And I got it… on tape.. recorded on a dictaphone and available for the Police to listen to….

When he was through doing that…. he politely said goodbye and said he was off biking. Oh I forgot to mention he promised to harrass and abuse me all the following week as well.

I’ll admit something now to the faceless few people who read my journal.. this scared me.. it upset me to the point of tears. Listening to this man berate my Mother made me so angry and upset… listening to him scream abuse at me and threaten to kill me.. and my family… it had me in tears… and I hate that it had me in tears… I hate myself for letting this absolute fucking nutcase of a man do this to me. I hate it.

I came home tonight and called the police again.. told them what had happened and told them that I was scared and frightened. They told me they’ll send someone over on Monday to work to take a statement.