Its weird how quickly one settles down into routine… forgets things.. or more truthfully.. puts things to the back of ones mind so that one doesn’t think about things…

Until today PSNM hadn’t been in touch for over a month. He has been conspicuous by his absence for over a month now but to be truthful.. I wasn’t complaining. I think the last time I had him scream abuse at me down the phone was around the 26th on June… and I must admit that although I still think about him.. and wonder what he is doing.. I don’t dwell on him for too long and I now have the hateful (to myself) attitude… that as long as he isn’t harrassing me.. I don’t give a shit where he is.

Today he blasted back with a vengence…. his voice took me by surprise.. and I actually didn’t place it for a few brief seconds.. whereas I had gotten so used to him that I actually recognised the way he drew breath before starting his tirade of abuse and I would cut him off before he had finished his forst word. Today I wasn’t quick enough ont he ball and after saying my usual “Good Morning Fat Cats and Bitchy Secretary Solicitors” he hurled a torrent of abuse at me before I could cut him off. He started with the words.. “Hello you f**king fat bitch” and then called continuously for almost 30 minutes.. bringing the phone system to a complete halt and causing chaos. May God strike me down for what I am about to say but I wish he’d been on that bus in London and not any of the innocent people who didn’t deserve to die. My hate for this man is that large.

I came home this evening thinking about how on earth he still hasn’t been arrested. And I also got to thinking about how the police seem to have done nothing to even try to find him… hes calling other solicitors… and phoning the CPS office as well… so why the hell wont they do anything about it. He must be working.. drawing benefit.. paying a phone bill… shit.. he calls me from a landline every time he calls… bit hes also called me from his mobile. Can’t they look his mobile number up in the “system” and see where the dignal originates from??? or does he have to actually have to carry out his threat to “get me” before they do anything like that??? Have they contacted the firm of solicitors in London who wrote to us telling us they were acting for him??? Have they circulated his alias that I gave them??? Have they contacted his mobile phone provider (which I discovered through making phone calls) to find out if he is on a contract.. with a correspondence address? This all just pisses me off so much.. it really does.. my head is dipped again.. thinking about what luies in store for me tomorrow because no0 doubt he’ll call again.. now hes reminded himself that I’m still here….